For the sake of upholding this semi-innocent reputation (80% innocence if you were wondering) I have successfully convinced my parents I have—there are quite a few things I can honestly say I would never admit to doing or having done—one of them being getting slapped in the face with a penis.

It just doesn’t seem like something I could even convince either of them happened without me playing some role in it being done, but I digress.

Seriously, I can just hear my momma yelling, “Well what in the hell was your face doing down there in the first place? Why was his penis anywhere near your face?” To which I would have to come up with an elaborate story better than a virgin mysteriously getting pregnant by a spirit having never had sex. Because nothing short of a prophecy would convince her otherwise.

But obviously, there is a brave soul out there who this has happen to and unfortunately for him, she’s telling it all.

Nearly 16 years ago, Jamie Foxx allegedly slapped a woman with his appendage after she refuted him for oral sex. According to TMZ, the accuser is stating the initial contact was made after Foxx approached her for oral sexual favors at his Las Vegas residence in 2002. She claims that when she declined the offer, he used his penis as a weapon and physically assaulted her.

After refusing the offer and being penis slapped—the Ike Turner of penis slapping then told one of his friends to ask her to leave. Due to this, the woman stated she had to go to the hospital the next day to get treatment for a panic attack.

In lieu of all this drama, his attorney, Allison Hart stated, “The alleged incident was not reported to law enforcement in 2002, or at any other time in the last 16 years until last Friday because the incident never happened.”

Now I’m not sure when you should stand up and admit you’ve been penis assaulted, but it appears his attorney believes it should have occurred somewhere around 16 years ago. However, I do have so many questions like—where did it hit her at? Did he smack her in the mouth or was it a cheek slap? Did it poke her in the eye? How hard was the penis slap and did it leave it a mark? Was a it forward penis slap or did he do some kind of turn with it as he slapped her? Bottom line is I have some serious questions about the penis whipping offense that I really need answered.

Anyway, the woman’s claim has come out due to her being inspired by the #MeToo movement. Her brave step was to hopefully give others who may also be victims a voice.

Unimpressed with the claims, Hart also went on record stating she would be filing a report with the LVPD against the woman accusing him for “filing a false police report,” since the claim in itself is absurd.

Hart also added, “Jamie empathically denies that this incident ever occurred.”

Well of course he does. Who in their right mind wants to go down as the Pied Piper of Penis Slapping?

Not me.

Shadress Denise
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